


Back Alley MD

by Lightning_Anonymous



Category: Amateur Surgeon (Video Games)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Prompt Fic, Writing Exercise, alan is stupid and has a crush, dwayne is stupid and has a crush but can repress these better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 13:53:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29842491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lightning_Anonymous/pseuds/Lightning_Anonymous
Summary: "Do you have a minute?" Alan turned to look behind him, a man he recognized clearly from the warehouse towering over him.Alan hesitated. Bleed was gone, just like last time. Odd how the guy only showed up while his mentor was gone. "Oh, uh! Yeah! Go ahead, Mr. d'Obscene."The visitor, Horrace d'Obscene, took a drag from his cigarette, slow and almost reluctant."Call me Dwayne Pipe, will you, pizza boy?"
Relationships: Dwayne Pipe/Alan Probe





	Back Alley MD

Whenever Bleed left, the old hospital-slash-alley could get awfully quiet. Alan usually spent his downtime sorting through the tools and trying to find new uses for them- if he was going to be doing surgery with a chainsaw and pizza cutter, may as well put them to good use! His hands unscrewed and screwed the lid of the Pain-Away Gel open and shut as he subconsciously wondered if the seal could or _would_ break. His attention was nearly entirely focused on this question, so if any unlucky patie-

"Do you have a minute?" Speak of the devil. Alan turned to look behind him, a man he recognized clearly from the warehouse towering over him. He'd made a mental note back then when they'd first met: _he is_ so _hot._ And his name, obviously. Looks and name, name and looks.

Alan hesitated. Bleed was gone, just like last time. Odd how the guy only showed up while his mentor was gone. It was like... a date! "Oh, uh! Yeah! Go ahead, Mr. d'Obscene."

The visitor, Horrace d'Obscene, took a drag from his cigarette, slow and almost reluctant. 

"Call me Dwayne Pipe, will you, pizza boy?"

If the alley wasn't silent prior to Horra- _Dwayne's_ arrival, it certainly was now. The surgeon fumbled with the Pain-Away Gel jar as the realization hit him. It fell to the ground after a few moments, bouncing once and then rolling under a dumpster. "Ah, man. Uh. I'll get that later," he mumbled mostly to himself as he looked back up at Dwayne. He stared down with a gaze that seemed a lot softer than the one he'd held before, but it chilled right back up as soon as they locked eyes. _Weird._ "Is that, like, a nickname..? Or is your name actually the same as-"

"Former apprentice of Doctor Ignacious Bleed, that would be me." Dwayne gave a small bow as if honoring royalty. Alan couldn't help the small laugh he let out, a nervous smile tracing his lips. 

"Wait, you were his old apprentice?!" His voice was mixed with box excitement and a hint of anxiety, and really, not even Alan himself knew which he leaned towards more. "Aren't you supposed to be... y'know?"

Dwayne barked a laugh as he tossed his cigar down, his toothy grin seeming only half fake. It looked nice. Pretty. Handsome. "You can say the word _dead_ , pizza boy! You're a surgeon anyways."

"Sorry, sorry!" Alan waved his hands a bit, glancing down towards the concrete. "It's just... weird." A pause. "...Uh. Bleed said he'd be back soon, though, dude. You... _miiight_ wanna get going. Uh. We can, like, meet up somewhere? You can explain everything! It'd be my first date with someone so strikingly _handsome_ as you, y'know!" He was obviously trying to sound smooth, but it ended up just being stupid because of how much his voice shook.

But it seemed to work. Or, at the very least, Dwayne was damn good at pretending it did. "The sentiment is requited," he said plainly with a smirk. "I suppose I can meet with you at a restaurant late tonight. But do not refer to me as Dwayne in front of anyone, you understand, pizza boy?"

Alan raised his hand in a salute, beaming wide. "Yessir, Mr. d'Obscene!"

"Good." The former... apprentice? Yeah, that sounded right. The former apprentice nodded curtly and turned on his heel. "Goodbye for now, Probe."

"Aww, you're not going to call me pizza boy anymore?" he fake-pouted.

Dwayne flinched, turning his head to look at Alan over his shoulder. "You _liked_ me referring to you as such? I thought it was insulting."

"I thought it was endearing." The surgeon shrugged.

Silence. Dwayne finally looked back at the pavement. Alan thought he caught the smallest hint of a smile.

"Goodbye for now, pizza boy. I'll see you soon."


End file.
